


half full, half empty

by linier (rasyalleva)



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Gen, Historical References, Short, Starfish sites, Trying to write in English—again
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-02
Updated: 2019-02-02
Packaged: 2019-10-20 19:14:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,182
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17628068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rasyalleva/pseuds/linier
Summary: "I just wanted to make sure you're not dead."It was Ludwig, and Arthur couldn't bear to respond with these words that he knew he would regret instantly, but he had to admit:"I wish I was."





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**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [ia, dan hati nurani yang selalu bisa mati](https://archiveofourown.org/works/17157704) by [rasyalleva](https://archiveofourown.org/users/rasyalleva/pseuds/rasyalleva). 



> Hetalia: Axis Powers is created by Hidekaz Himaruya, and I ain't gain any kind of profit by writing this fanfiction. 
> 
> Hi there! I tried to write something in English that isn't my first language, and I don't mind improving so it would be very helpful if you could give me few advices. Thank you and have a nice day! ☘

For the record, Arthur thought he was going to die. Okay, he _knew_ that countries' personification have zero possibilities to meet the death _even if he tried so hard_ , but the injuries all over his body was very hurt that he couldn't breath normally. The debris above his back were so heavy he couldn't move himself. Besides, it was already night and his soldiers weren't that stupid for checking every broken empty building manually one by one after being bombed by the Germans to found someone alive under it ruins. (Duh, it should be an _empty_ building in the first place, why wasting time searching?)

There were times where Arthur just knew that it was his lost ... and also his death, _even if turned out it weren't_. It is impossible to die, but what could he say when he drowned in Atlantic Ocean when the Spanish destroyed the ship he stood still? Or when he badly injuried by a sword held by the French, apart from his troops in the middle of no- _fucking-_ clue-where until he thought that he would be died of blood loss?

Just like right now. Hours before, he just stayed in one of the Starfish sites, wanted to make sure that this fake city really did attract the Germans and get bombed during the night. And it actually did. He could heard the sound of Germans' bomber plane that so loud, right up his head, and he also just knew that they have already dropped the bomb. In all of sudden it cracked everywhere; the ruins hit his head and weighed his back and on its way to _overtaking his life_ —

Just because, after all this time, there aren't any coutries' personification that dead yet, doesn't mean that they _couldn't_. Perhaps they could.

Perhaps _he_ could.

There was no such thing as a miracle like one when he awoke on an unknown beach in an uninhabited island after drowned in Atlantic. Or like one when he found his troops' in the middle of the wood after walking for hours with several injuries. He already given by so many miracles saved his life that he hadn't feel the need for being grateful even for once, so if the miracle didn't came for him this time, it's okay. It was his fault, therefore it was also his lost, and, _and_ , and also his death—

He hears a sound. Someone moving the ruins, especially the one that makes him unable to move. It's being moved and Arthur suddenly can feel the coldly night air for him to taking breath from. He gets up, but suddenly his head hurts it makes him feeling dizzy, then he can feel the warm made by blood falling from his cheek to his chin, dripping down to his hands that shaking—couldn't be that strong to help his body fully get up. In split of second, everything was blurry, and the last thing he felt was that his face hit the ground.

And the last sound he heard was someone shouting his name in half-afraid-half-panicked tone, "Arthur!"

×

Long story short, it was Ludwig.

When he was awake, Arthur found himself was leaning in a big tree, and he isn't alone. That man sit in front of him, keep his eyes locked on his; and Arthur couldn't hold himself to feel bothered by how many minutes passed for him to stayed still in that position. But to be fair, so many questions filled his head that he couldn't open his mouth to voiced any of those. And when Arthur finally concluded that no words would come from the opposite side either so he was the one that should speak, Ludwig began the conversation.

"You're alive."

Arthur didn't know what to say. "Yeah." He mumbled. "Now what— _thanks to you?_ "

Ludwig didn't say a word. Suddenly it was an instant regret from Arthur, yet he tried so hard to not showing it. He knew that he should say thank you and there was no need to be such _an annoying shit_ like that, but he just couldn't help himself. Why did Ludwig here? But there's no way he could receive the answer. How come? That's more important, but it's more unlikely for him to get the answer too. Both of them aren't idiot; their bloody wars—that still weren't enough until this day and that was exactly the reason why they keep continuing this thing—prove that.

"I ... honestly, I can't stay here little longer," said Ludwig, but he isn't get up yet, "I just want to make sure you're not dead."

"Though I wish I was."

Silence. Ludwig looked him in the eyes and Arthur suddenly felt so small that Ludwig could easily crushed him by his feet—it feels the worst; when he always get this instant regret every single time he said a word.

But Arthur meant it, truly. He wanted to die. Well, if he didn't, why the hell he would take himself alone to went to a place filled with none but empty bunkers, which made in intention to be the Germans' target for bombs landing? Why the hell he was feeling okay to thought that there would be no such thing as miracle that saved his life again like before?

"This situation doesn't suit for that kind of conversation, Arthur."

"Exactly."

"I have to go."

His heart hurts a slightly higher amount than he used to believe, he even forgot how his body was so hurt by many injuries couple of minutes before. But Arthur try to give a quick response. "I know."

There's hesitated expression in Ludwig's face—so fast, yet so clear to be seen. Ludwig prepares himself to get up, and Arthur realise that this moment couldn't ever happened anymore—no way, when currently he even isn't sure what kind of plan that he should make to maintaining this body alive. That realisation flied over his head so fast that Arthur thought he missed too much, but it made him didn't give a chance for himself to overthink it and begins to speak, " _Hey_ —look."

Ludwig, who've already stood up, freeze. His head turns down a little bit, seeing Arthur that still doesn't have the ability to get up yet.

Arthur didn't know what to say, but whatever it is, he didn't want to regret that. He looked away when he already find the words. "I'm sorry."

He wasn't sure what were those things he apologised for. Perhaps, for the situation, that didn't suit them to have a longer conversations. Perhaps, for both of them, that have always been at different side in war for each other. Or perhaps, for the time—that didn't give them all of those above.

And it clearly was not on Arthur's thought when Ludwig replies to the statement he made, "Me too."

For the hatred they waste for each of them—when actually it was the moment that went wrong; and for the absence of openly admitted it even if they both actually know deep down by heart in the very start.[]


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